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Looking for girlfriend > Looking for a husband > My boyfriend is distant but says nothing is wrong

My boyfriend is distant but says nothing is wrong

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At the beginning, he comes on strong — he pursues you relentlessly, buys you gifts, compliments you, plans dates and outings, makes an effort to make you feel special…. He pulls away. So why does this man — whom things were so great with at the beginning — suddenly seem like a completely different person? This is the part of the brain that is in every living creature — of course, reptiles included.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: When a Man Ignores Your Value, Say THIS To Him

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Why Is He Acting Distant All Of A Sudden

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As far as bad feelings go, nothing takes the cake quite like feeling like your partner is unhappy. After all, relationships are supposed to be comfy and secure, so this suspicion can really turn life upside down. Are things coming to an end? Did you do something wrong? These thoughts can spiral out of control, and leave you wondering if it has anything to do with you. Of course, paranoia often makes things feel way worse than they actually are. It could be your partner is just stressed or working through some private issue, and you're reading way into it.

A quick convo with them can reveal that nothing's wrong, and that you were being silly all along. If your partner remains all cold-shouldery, however, it can be tough to shake that nagging worry. Scott Carroll , in an email to Bustle. Even if they aren't sure what's up, it helps if you can recognize the signs of a problem.

Read on for some of them, and be sure to follow up with your SO if any hit close to home. It can be a bit disconcerting when your partner suddenly starts living at work. Of course, nine times out of ten it's only because they're busy. But if they do it often enough, it's easy to feel like they're avoiding you. To test it out — and give you peace of mind — Carroll suggests scheduling a date night. It's much better than worrying, and way better than assuming the worst. While everyone gets grumpy, this is especially true of men who are unhappy in their relationship.

You may notice your SO is short-tempered or irritable for seemingly no reason. He may also feel like he's stressed out or annoyed, but doesn't quite know why. If your partner is a dude, these could be signs that something's up — especially if he's directing the grumpiness at you. While no one wants to argue, disagreeing is what healthy couples do. So if your partner suddenly can't be bothered to have a fight, it may be they've checked out of the relationship , according to lifestyle writer Amy Shearn on HuffingtonPost.

You might hear them say things like "we've been over this before," or "I don't want to talk about it. Couples who are in sync often go to bed at the same time. You know, so they can have sex or cuddle or lie next to each other whilst reading. So take note if your partner is going to bed early or staying up late, Carroll tells me. If they aren't up working or doing something important, it may be they are simply avoiding you because they're unhappy in the relationship.

Are you the one who's been busier than usual? If you haven't been giving your partner the attention they need, they may start to show you by being a bit This might come in the form of clinginess, or them asking for "help" with mundane tasks. If your SO's friends hear good news well before you do, it could be your partner no longer views you as their go-to person. It could also be that they don't trust you , or feel like you don't care about what they have to say.

If this has been a problem throughout your relationship, then yes — it probably is you or at least your habits that are making them unhappy. Your SO used to think all your quirks and eccentricities were endearing.

But now they only view them as eye-roll worthy, or even downright annoying. This shift in opinion is often a sign that your partner is checking on out , according to relationships writer Ossiana Tepfenhart on TheBolde.

Of course you're doing nothing wrong, but your unhappy partner fails to see it that way — and that's not OK. It's not necessary for your SO to love all your friends and fam. But it is necessary that they respect them. If they aren't — or worse, if they are critical of them — it could point to a problem. So if your partner does this on the regular, have a chat with them to see what's up.

While there's obviously nothing wrong with making new friends, there might be something up with a partner who forges friendships that have nothing to do with you. As Carroll tells me, this will come in the form of new people who aren't "couple" friends AKA, people you two hang out with together. When this happens, it could be your SO is creating a new life for themselves that has nothing to do with you. Carroll tells me that a depressed partner may be just that — depressed.

But it could also be that they're realizing the relationship isn't making them happy , and it's getting them down. Again, the only way to to know is to ask. Your partner should be able to spare a moment of their time to ask about your day.

If they can't be bothered, you have ever right to question them, as well as every right to assume something's up. Don't let this issue go undiscussed. But, like I said above, these examples can be signs of other issues — depression, anxiety, etc. So don't jump to conclusions. If you sense that your partner is unhappy, and think it may have something to do with you, then sit down for a chat.

Sometimes a heart-to-heart is all it takes to get things back on track. They're Staying Late At Work.

What to Do When Your Boyfriend Doesn’t Have Time for You

We have all had toxic people dust us with their poison. Being able to spot their harmful behaviour is the first step to minimising their impact. There are plenty of things toxic people do to manipulate people and situations to their advantage.

As far as bad feelings go, nothing takes the cake quite like feeling like your partner is unhappy. After all, relationships are supposed to be comfy and secure, so this suspicion can really turn life upside down. Are things coming to an end?

At first, everything was amazing. We hit it off right away and during the first few weeks, he seemed super into me. He was also super attentive and super sweet. For example, in the beginning, both of you might feel a lot of excitement and also an undercurrent of fearful restlessness. The excitement is on thinking about all the things they like about you.

Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Is Distant and How to Deal With It

It may not be obvious. He may brush you off or be quick to dismiss you. You can feel him pulling away and with every tug, your level of panic increases. Every time you try things seem to get worse. You may try asking him this very question, but it effectively gets you nowhere. He just gets annoyed or tells you everything is fine or gives you one-word answers. Suffice to say, this will not work. A very important relationship skill is to learn to respond instead of reacting. When you react, you have zero control. You are a slave to your emotions.

The Surprising Truth About The Silent Treatment

Maybe he says that he loves you, but he still acts distant towards you. Your instincts are going to scream at you that you need to get reassurance and validation from him. The huge mistake that many women make in this situation is to let fear of loss control their actions. When you let fear and insecurity dictate your actions in your relationship, you make it much, much more likely that things will fall apart between you. That feels awful for both of you, and winds up pushing him away even further.

I've been branded the "Advice Queen" by most of my girlfriends and have been faced with this question a few times.

Any time a relationship I was in started taking this kind of turn for the worse I did what so many of us do. I started hanging on tighter. I would get scared, and instead of taking a step back and reassessing the relationship, I just clung on like my life depended on it. After all, it had started off so well — it had to be worth saving, no matter what it took.

Why Men Go Hot and Cold & 5 Things You Need to Do…

If you've ever been in any sort of relationship, you've probably felt it ebb and flow in different ways as time went on. One such way a relationship might change is when you feel your partner becoming somewhat distant. Sometimes relationships change, no matter how much we wish they wouldn't, so it's normal to feel a partner begin to pull away if you've been together for awhile and things haven't been the same. Anyone who's ever experienced this knows that it can be really scary, because knowing exactly what to do when your partner is acting distant , without pushing them away even more, can definitely be a challenge.

There are smart ways to respond and draw him closer instead of reacting and pushing him further away! Instead of complaining or pleading with your him, remember that you have more power than you think! And you can use your power wisely. What do I do? Instead of relying on your boyfriend for your self-image, find ways to love and honor yourself, to see yourself the way God sees you.

Toxic People: 12 Things They Do and How to Deal with Them

Subscribe To Our Newsletter! A change in behavior from your significant other can be upsetting and confusing. One of the worst feelings is when he acts distant all of a sudden. You are then left not knowing what to think and not knowing what you should do. Do you talk to him or do you leave him alone?

These tips for coping with a physically distant or emotionally absent boyfriend “He's my first boyfriend, and we got back together after 12 years apart,” says D. has to do before he sees me so nothing gets in his away and my attention is all his. But one thing I do know is that you can never go wrong developing your own.

Research has shown that the act of ignoring or excluding activates the same area of the brain that is activated by physical pain. The key to being closer in the good times lies in the way a couple treats each other during the bad. The initial pain is the same, regardless of whether the exclusion is by strangers, close friends or enemies.

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